day 3...we have a DATE!!!

YAYA!!!! FINALLY got ahold of dispatch this morning. My stuff is in a warehouse and it is all in a truck now. Still don't know how much I'm going to owe them (they've still gotta weigh the truck since it had someone else's stuff on it before), but it's gonna be here TUESDAY MORNING!!! Right this second, that's about 36 hours away. i can do that.

otherwise, things are good. i got a craving for lobster bites from Long John Silver's. no problem right? so i type it in to my GPS. get to the location, and it's not LJS anymore. bummer. so i go south to hit the loop and head to Michelle's. problem. the entrance ramp was out, so i had to follow the access road and then get back on. type LJS into my GPS for a second time to get the closest location to michelle's. get to it, and guess what...it's not a LJS anymore, either. !! so i head for the third closest location on my GPS, praying that it's actually a LJS. SCORE! third time's the charm, i guess. and yes...they were worth it. now I'm at Michelle's washing the towels we got today at walmart to get us through until the moving truck gets here with the rest of my stuff. we got a queen-size air mattress so mom and i would not have to continue to stay in a hotel (since i have my linens with me) and we got two camp chairs for the living room. we put an empty ice chest between the two chairs for drinks and then turned a laundry basket upside down to function as an ottoman/footrest. pics to follow... ah, this will make for memories later.

my health screening is tomorrow at 11 AM...get to be poked and stuck and injected and God knows what else...hope i can find the place with relative ease.

well, off to the hospital with Michelle to go see the babies and take a present for them...this will serve the dual function of me actually getting to DRIVE to the hospital and get a feel for where to go.

much love!!

day 2 (written in the wee hours of day 3)

ah, the lengths we will go to in order to stay connected with the rest of the world...i am sure definitely sitting in my little kia in the parking lot of a hotel that i am NOT staying in so that i can filch their wifi long enough to update my blog. the internet at my house is not set up yet (hard to do since my network computer is sitting on a truck that only God knows where it is...more in a minute) and the hotel we are staying in does not have wireless, free or otherwise. i was going to go to michelle's and pirate off of theirs, but then she called me and said that this drunk lady hit her car and then drove off! (she's fine, car's perfectly driveable) and so she has to stay near the hospital, where the accident happened (she had just gotten done seeing the twins she delivered four weeks ago-surrogate pregnancy). thus my current situation. yes, go ahead, laugh...only me!

so...the hot topic of the moment...where's my stuff? answer...i dunno. I called the moving company friday around noon, and they said they didn't have the stuff yet...probably later on that day. (The company i originally contacted, Nationwide, only coordinates the move...they get all the pertinent info, etc., and then call a company that they contract with and pass that info on...Express Relocation, in this case...and Express is the company who gets the truck and the actual movers). So Nationwide is sort of a go-between for me and Express. So I call Nationwide back around 3 on Friday, and they say we're really sorry, still don't have any info, but we'll have customer service give you a holler this evening and update you. Bout 7 Friday night, I'm at dinner, having some fabulous cheese rolls and sushi, and I realize that I haven't gotten a call back yet. Bah. So I try both companies...both are closed for the day. Bah again. So we (me, mom, bubba) got a hotel (Bubba got here around 5) and decided to just chill for the night.

This morning (Saturday morning), I got up and called Nationwide, thinking that surely they would have some info by now. They tried to call Express, and didn't get an answer. They left a message and then got back on the phone with me, apologized, said they are usually really good about quickly returning phone calls, but would I like their number so that I could call them? absolutely. i'd love it. so i call the number (which I already had from the drama when I still hadn't heard from anyone about when my movers were gonna show up the day before they were supposed to be there), and i get the answering machine. wanna know why? because Express is CLOSED ON SATURDAY!!! what the heck?!?! they're open friday and SUNDAY, but closed saturday. great. so i leave them a not-so-patient message (no, Kristie, I didn't cuss at them...but i wanted to! guess i'll put my quarters in the mail...). then i get online to see if i can find any other numbers for this company. i find one, it ends up being a call center, they give me a different number than the one i have, but it just rings off the hook. bah. so then i decide, "well, i've still got the moving truck driver's phone number; i'll call him. y'all, I just counted...i called him NINE TIMES on my phone and left messages. he has yet to return my call. at around 2:15 this afternoon, Nationwide called me and said we're really sorry, we've tried calling them, and we think they're closed today...we recommend that you be on the phone with them first thing Monday morning. No worries...I'll be on the phone with them here in about eight hours when they open at 9:00 AM Sunday morning. i wouldn't be so antsy, but remember how the people whose stuff was supposed to be UNloaded before mine was LOADED stood the driver up? well, that means that not quite all my stuff fit INSIDE the truck, so it rode strapped to the ramp on the back of the truck...on the OUTSIDE... for nine hours to houston and has possibly (although i dearly HOPE they have more sense than this) been sitting out in the elements for the last 48 hours? yeah. we're talking my bedroom suite, my office desk, my kitchen table, my queen size mattress and box springs...it is only by the grace of God that I am not crawling out of my skin with anger and fear. thank you to my sweet friends who i know have been praying for my sanity and my stuff's safety...you bless me!

anyway, back to today. bubba and i left mom at the hotel (she was real tired and just wanted to read her book) and finally went to my apartment and unloaded what has been in my truck. again, by the grace of God, I have clean sheets, my comforter, my t-shirt quilt mom made me, shower curtain, cleaning stuff...basic necessities if, God forbid, my stuff doesn't get here for another several days. so we unloaded and put all of that away and then went to wal-mart for a bathroom *PAUSE*

i've had my ipod on listening to it as i type, and I've just kind of been halfway. it was almost as if God just tuned me in to the beginning of the song that just began to play...

"what a friend we have in Jesus
all our sins and griefs to bear
what a privilege to carry
EVERYTHING to God in prayer

oh what peace we often forfeit
oh what needless pain we bear
all because we do not carry
EVERYTHING to God in prayer

HAVE WE TRIALS and temptations?
IS THERE TROUBLE ANYWHERE?
WE SHOULD NEVER BE DISCOURAGED...
take it to the Lord in prayer!

can we find a friend so faithful
who will all our sorrows share?
Jesus knows our every weakness
take it to the Lord in prayer

Jesus knows my every weakness...
take it to the Lord in prayer!"

thank you, Jesus...i needed that. in the midst of my craziness and confusion, continually remind me to stop and be still...

anyway, bubba and i went to walmart for a small cabinet to put in my bathroom (a little extra storage space) and some other randomness that i needed. we spent several hours at my new place between unloading the truck, walmart, and then back to the house to set up our purchases (along with the bathroom cabinet, we got two camp chairs for the living room and a queen-size air mattress in case my stuff really DOES take several more days and a corner storage rack for my shower that i'm gonna have to return...it doesn't fit...i hate rturning stuff to walmart; can i get an amen?). then we went and picked mom up for dinner...Pappasito's, mmm. Got the seafood enchiladas. it was ok, but the sauce was a little sweet and the scallops were a little overpowering. Took mom to the apartment for the first time after dinner, and then we stopped by the cheesecake factory on the way back to the hotel...YES, LORD! I got a slice of blueberry white chocolate cheesecake...mmm. just mmmm. then me, mom, and mark sat on one of the hotel beds and played phase 10 and i SO WON by the skin of my teeth! it was such fun...we laughed and laughed.

ok, friends, this is way too long...i gotta get to bed so that i'll be halfway willing to emerge from my covers in the morning to call Express back. pray that Satan doesn't temporarily inhabit my body and take control of my attitude. and pray that maybe i'll finally get SOME kind of information about the whereabouts of my stuff and when i'll get it...

love you all...i'm holding on to 1 thessalonians 5:24--"the One who calls you is faithful, and He will do it." whatever the IT is in your life right now...remember, you're never out of His hand. He's hanging on to you and He's got a plan. the t-shirt is true...LIFE IS GOOD!

~amy :)

day 1

well, we finally got to San Antonio early this morning...i crossed the San Antonio city limit sign at 1:52 AM. got to Michelle's at about 2:15, was in bed by 3. woke up this morning at 11...good sleep. I called the moving company earlier this morning, but they didn't have the weight estimate and delivery time for me just yet. i'm betting the driver didn't get to bed until well after i did (they had to go back to houston, remember), so he'll probably fax the paperwork to the moving company after he wakes up. As it's already almost 2:00 PM and it takes 3-5 hours to get from Houston to here with a moving truck, my money's on them not getting here and unloading until tomorrow. that's ok. i can get into my new place, put a roll of tp on the roll, and get oriented. go to walmart...all that good stuff. actually, i guess i'll be going to HEB...the grocery stores down here. gotta check that business out.

so for those who are wondering...yes, it finally hit me. In a bathroom stall in a truck stop in Junction, TX. of all places...whatever. everything i have known for months in my head finally got across to my heart. now, before you go saying "we told you so"...yes, you did. but you didn't have to. i knew it was coming; i just didn't know when. i won't lie...my heart was a little overwhelmed that all of the incredible people i know and love are now at least six hours away. that i have to make new friends...that after so much time, it's finally here and this is really happening and not somethiing abstract any more. that i really am starting a new job...bottom of the totem pole...don't know anyone...don't know anything...that i may have to humble myself and be okay with asking for help and give up my independent streak for a little while.

but then i'm reminded...the God of the universe...the one who is head over heels in love with me...the one who sacrificed everything...EVERYTHING so that I could be His...He is here. i saw a quote recently that speaks such hope and peace into my heart...

"When you come to the edge of all the light you have known and are about to step out into the darkness, Faith is knowing that one of two things will happen: there will be something to stand on or you will be taught how to fly." -unknown

So pray with me...pray that my heart is open to new experiences and new people. that on the days and nights that i am hurting and lonely that i remember that my Redeemer lives...that He holds me in the palm of His hand...that i am HIS and he knows what is going on...that His head is not in His hands when things go awry. Pray that i trust Him for my strength and that I will lean wholeheartedly into His most Everlasting Arms.

Off to the new place for the first time here in a bit...will let you know how it goes!

moving day

i am sitting on the floor in my house to blog this. as i type, the movers are covering my furniture with blankets and very quickly and efficiently packing my life into a fraction of the square footage that i've had it spread out in. i'm just grateful to not have to be doing it. they're packing everything into the moving van (in front of someone else's stuff...it was supposed to be dropped off before they came here, but the people who own it had somewhere more important to be today. they stood the movers up after a nine hour drive. i don't know about y'all, but i can't think of many things more important than being at a predetermined place when my stuff shows up. whatever.

after the movers finish packing my stuff in the truck, they are driving straight back to Houston to drop off one of the movers and to get some sleep. then, tomorrow, they will drive from houston to san antonio and bring me my stuff. we hope. the guy in charge said they have to give me a time range just in case something disastrous happens (please Jesus, put your hand on this truck, and that's for reals there), but they should have my stuff to me tomorrow. again, all sorts of prayer would be greatly appreciated!

at this point, i'm just glad they're here...i called the company yesterday because they had told me i'd hear from the movers a few days in advance to set up a time for them to be at my house. after much confusion and wrong information, i was told they'd be here between noon and two o'clock today, because they were coming from houston. lovely. so i got myself all in a bother instead of trusting God that if his hand has been in this from the beginning, it will be in the moving part, too. so they're here and all is good and i can't believe that this is my last day in a town that i've spent almost the last seven years living in.

so at this point, the plan for me and mom is that we will drive to San Antonio tonight and stay with my friend Michelle and then go to my new place tomorrow and start getting stuff in the fridge, figuring out where everything is going to go, etc. then hopefully the movers will be there tomorrow afternoon. God, give me patience...i am having a really hard time letting go and trusting someone else with my stuff. maybe i should downsize? :)

so that's all for the moment...more updates later. maybe even tonight when we get to san antonio!! hopefully it'll only take the movers another hour or so and we'll be on the road in another hour and a half. hopefully...

much love to all my lubbockites! i love you and i'm gonna miss you heaps!!! to all my future...what do you call people who live in san antonio?...well, to all my future whatever-you-call-yous...i can't wait to get to know you!

T minus 10 days...

...until my life is completely changed. this chapter is almost finished and, in fact, God has already begun writing the next one. Pray for me, friends...for courage, to be outgoing and friendly...and that I will lean into the MOST everlasting Arms on the days surely to come when I will be afraid, sad, missing my friends and family, missing my unit...missing everything familiar. A lot of people haven't heard the whole story, beginning to end, so I thought I would repost an email I sent to a friend who was wondering how it all came about. Maybe it's not right to say it was "God's will" that I move to San Antonio, but as you read, I hope you can sense (as I have on many occasions) that God's hand has definitely been in this from before the beginning and believe along with me that I am pretty sure I have His blessing.

the San Antonio story

I started thinking about my next steps in my career about a year ago...I was at Lubbock Christian working on my bachelor's degree in nursing. most of my college friends were married and/or had moved away from Lubbock, and I chose to continue renting when I graduated from nursing school, not knowing what the next few years held. Around May 2008, I started tossing around the idea of moving to a bigger city. Dallas was out; it's TOO big. Houston? Too big, too close to hurricanes. I didn't want to be on the verge of evacuation for six months out of the year. San Antonio? hmm. Warm...hills...trees...gorgeous...So I toyed with the idea and did a little research.

I knew that if I moved, I wanted to work in a Christus Health System affiliated hospital. They are a system that I've heard great things about and seen great things from. They took incredible care of my Grandaddy before he died. Also, as part of a rural health trip to New Mexico for a class I took toward my bachelor's degree, we spoke to the CEO of a hospital that had recently merged with the Christus system. He went on and on about how wonderful they had been to him and to his staff and employees and how smoothly the merge had gone (you have to know...hospital mergers are usually about as peaceable as a meeting between God and Satan!). So I got online last spring and figured out that San Antonio was, indeed, home to a Christus hospital...Christus Santa Rosa, located downtown. I put the idea to the back of my head, because I had a VERY busy summer ahead of me.

Toward the end of the summer, a flyer for a pediatric conference appeared in the nurses' lounge at work. I picked it up and saw that one of the sessions was about brain cooling for a condition called HIE (hypoxic-ischemic encephalopathy)...basically, it happens when, in an otherwise healthy, close to full-term pregnancy, something happens that suddenly deprives the baby of oxygen...the placenta breaks away from the uterine wall, the uterus ruptures, the umbilical cord slips down into the vaginal canal and the pressure from the baby's head prevents the flow of oxygen, etc. Anyway, lots of research has been done in the last several years and experts are finding that if we cool these babies down to 92 degrees fahrenheit for 72 hours, it seems to help prevent the death of so many brain cells from lack of oxygen and thus these kids have less (or less severe) long term complications (cerebral palsy, etc.). the hospital I am currently at has not implemented that procedure yet, but I had heard about it and was really curious about the ins and outs of it and how well it's working. Well...after I get all pumped up about going to this conference because of that, I flip over the flyer to find out where the conference is. Yup, you guessed it. San Antonio. And guess who the sponsoring hospital was for the conference? Right again. Christus Santa Rosa. Well, I have always prayed that God make things really obvious for me, because I'm not real smart...

So I booked the hotel and the flight. The brain cooling for HIE session was first. The doctor who led the discussion was a physician who works in the Christus NICU (along with several other area NICUs). At one point, he asked one of the girls I had been talking to beforehand a question about a policy, and I decided to see if I could sit with her at lunch, since she obviously worked in a hospital with this procedure in place. So when the session was over, I followed her back to her table. Shocker...she's one of the two nurse educators for the Santa Rosa NICU. I had followed her back to a table full of NICU nurses who worked in the unit I wanted to be in.

I sat next to a girl named Michelle...little chick with hair dyed so platinum it looked steel-gray, who has been a nurse for close to 10 years. She blew me away...everyone talks about their baby days in nursing when they were so excited about everything, and how it gradually dies off for everyone. Not so for my girl Michelle. Here she was almost 10 years in and still gets excited about procedures, transports...and LEARNING! The girl wants to know everything, just like me. She talked about how there's several nurses in the unit she works in that still love their jobs even after many years of nursing...who still want to learn...who don't show up just for a paycheck. So I was totally in heaven for the rest of lunch. The two of us talked nonstop about the difference in practices in our two units, etc. It was so great! I told Michelle that we were supposed to get a tour of her hospital, including the NICU, that night. She told me to get a good look around and tell her what I thought that day.

A shuttle took us up to the hospital later for our tour. We were split into groups, and then I found out that the chick who was supposed to tour the group that I was in had never even BEEN to the NICU...she was a pediatrics nurse who had never had reason to step foot in there. Dammit! So she told us we would walk through and the nurse manager had agreed to tell us a little about the place. Well, we walked through and it was a really neat place, but the nurse manager didn't go into a lot of detail or tell me anything Michelle hadn't already. Oh well.

So the next morning, Michelle asks how it went, and when I tell her, she's like, "bummer!". We talked some more during the opening session and then went our separate ways before lunch. During lunch, I sat with her group again, and we talked some more. Then she asked if I was catching a plane back to Lubbock right after the conference was over. I told her no; I was going to spend a few days with a friend who would be picking me up when the conference was over. "Well," she says, "I have to leave a little early because my daughter has a choir concert, but it will be done by the time the conference is over. What if I swung back by here and picked you up and took you up to my unit, and I can give you a better tour than you got last night?" I was floored. She barely knew me and here she's offering to take me up there like we're best friends or something (might I add she had started hinting the first day of conference that I should come down and work with her!). I told her I'd love to. So she picks me up and gives me like a 45 minute tour! Then she takes me back to the hotel and tells me to keep in touch.

When I got back to Lubbock, I started to do some serious praying and soul-searching. Was this what God had for me next? A million what-ifs where whirling through my head (they still are, actually)...what about making new friends? finding a church? not knowing ANYONE? how will my body handle flipping back to nights (because I don't mind working nights, but it's a whole lot easier to schedule stuff when you're working days)? I love the unit I've worked in for the last two and a half years...I started there while I was still in nursing school. The people there have raised me up in this profession so far, and it's going to be really hard for me to "cut the apron strings" with my "mamas", so to speak. I have so many great memories from there, and have built some great friendships.

At the same time...this new thing is an incredible opportunity, and I think I would regret it for the rest of my life if I didn't jump into the unknown with only the Father to cling to. There's a Mark Schultz song that speaks my heart perfectly. It's called "When the Mountains Fall"...it's talking more about how when your life is falling down around you, you have to have the courage to jump and trust that the Father will take care of you, but i think it's appropriate in this situation too... "...you step out in faith/it's all that you know/you jump into darkness/and hold onto hope//when the mountains fall/when the rivers rise/security crumbles before your eyes/one thing you know/in faith you'll find/something to stand on/or you will be taught to fly.."

'Round the middle of February, I decided it would be smart to get moving on this thing. I did a little more research on the town, and I had been talking since November to Michelle, learning more about the unit I might be going to...etc. I figured it would be good to go down and meet the nurse manager, introduce myself and all, and maybe get one more tour of the unit. Then I decided that was crazy...if I'm gonna be driving 400 miles, I might as well go ahead and interview! I started the online application and then, on Monday, March 2, I called up the unit to see if I could meet the nurse manager and set up an interview time. The manager told me I actually needed to talk to the director, but that she was in meetings all week. However, the manager didn't think the meetings would last all day, so she promised to give her my name and number and told me to go ahead and finish the application so that HR would have a few days to get it rolled over to Catherine (the director) so that she'd be able to review it. No problem.

So I call up Michelle and tell her the plan (since I was going to be staying with her) and she offered to toss out my name and some props to Catherine. Sweet, I say. So Michelle calls me up a day or two later and tells me that I have an interview on Friday at 1:00. I started reviewing interview questions like mad in anticipation. I wasn't sure if the interview would be just with Catherine or if it would be a peer interview, but I wanted to be ready to answer whatever. I had also been praying that, when I did have an interview, I would be able to convey my excitement and my desire to learn and just be able to show this lady that I would be a valuable asset to her team because of my willingness and excitement and desire to learn (and my all around fabulousness...just kidding! :) ). See, since I'm only two years in, I'm just barely considered competent and am probably still considered a "baby" nurse...just getting my feet wet. So it's harder to convince people to pick me, since I don't have so much experience.

So I walk into this interview and it's just Catherine and a student nurse who is following her as part of an internship. Little intimidated, but I've got a smile on my face. So she starts out by introducing herself and then says, "I'm really sorry, but your application still hasn't rolled over to me from HR, so I know NOTHING about you...could you kind of tell me about yourself?" !!!! Total answer to prayers...without having seen my application, she didn't even know how long I'd been a nurse...what kind of experience I did or did not have...she was a blank slate! Thank you Jesus! So i got to tell her about me, about what I've done, what I want to do, what my future plans are...totally let my personality shine through. THe interview only lasted 10 or 15 minutes, very informal...once I was done telling her about me, she told me some about the unit, walked me around and gave me a tour, and then...

"Well, just so you know, I can't make you an offer, but how about if we call HR and see if any of them are still there, since it's Friday after lunch? Would you have time to talk to one of them?"

!!!!!!!! HOLY CRAP!!! DO I HAVE TIME? Um...YES! So we called HR and there were, indeed, some people there, so Michelle walked me down and then told me she'd meet me in her van when I was done. HR made me an incredible offer, went over benefits, told me about the sign-on and relocation packages (I thought I'd have to ask for relocation, but she said it before I could say anything) so I'm gonna guess that, since God has flung open the doors at every juncture...this is probably my next step, and with His blessing!

Things have been going in a whirlwind since then...my boss was really good about it, and there have been some people that have said some discouraging things, but you'll get that anywhere and really, I think it was more that they're sad to see me go and just concerned for me like a mama is for her kid. I've got movers and I've got a date...May 28th. There's still a lot that I don't know and I'm definitely taking a step of faith, but I'm interested to see what happens over the next year or so. I wonder what God has for me there.